In the News - September 2009
Communication key to healthy family relations
MURFREESBORO, Ark. - Communication is more than just talking and listening -
it's the ability to pay attention to thoughts and feelings, said Robbie
McKinnon, Pike County extension agent for the University of Arkansas Division of
Agriculture.
"When we communicate, we exchange factual information and we share emotions
with one another in the way we present the facts," she said. "It is the
communication that is verbal and non-verbal.
"I can certainly remember 'the look' that my dad used that I completely
understood," McKinnon said.
Today, parents and children may have more communication methods thanks to
e-mail, text messaging, cell phones, online instant messaging, or even
face-to-face, but the messages between the two parties aren't always clear.
McKinnon cited an instance from her days teaching high school, in which she was
talking to a student about behavior that needed correction.
"He told me that he was mixed up because I was smiling at him and nobody had
ever smiled at him when he was being corrected," she said. "I had been vague
because he had not understood my affective communication."
Fortunately, he asked for clarification.
"I was certainly glad he asked me questions until he fully understood my
communication," McKinnon said.
Being an active listener, as this student was, is important. It involves
acknowledging and respecting the other person's point of view.
"Be sure to listen to the whole conversation without making assumptions," she
said. "Assumptions are not always correct and can lead to a big
misunderstanding.
"Besides just listening, pay attention to facial expressions and body
language as the young man did when he needed to find out why I was smiling," she
said.
Clear and direct communication is the healthiest form of communication,
because when the message is plainly stated and is spoken directly to the person,
the message should not be easily misunderstood.
"Unhappy family relationships are often the result of negative
communication," McKinnon said.
For more information about strengthening family relationships, contact your
county extension office or visit
www.arfamilies.org/family_life/family/.
The Cooperative Extension Service is a part of the University of Arkansas
Division of Agriculture and offers its programs to all eligible persons
regardless of race, color, national origin, religion, gender, age, disability,
marital or veteran status, or any other legally protected status, and is an
Affirmative Action/Equal Opportunity Employer.
September 11, 2009
Media Contact: Elizabeth Fortune
Extension Communications Specialist
U of A Division of Agriculture
Cooperative Extension Service
(501) 671-2120
efortune@uaex.edu
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